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Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Mon Jan 17, 2011 1:34 pm
by claymore
The Muzz and I had a day at the boat show on Saturday.

I feel moved to comment on my observations of the activities and people surrounding the Oyster Stand.

The men all seem to wear a uniform of a Dark Blue overcoat, garishly brown thick corduroy trousers, faded suede deck shoes, a gingham pattern blue checked shirt and a red pullover.

To a man they all seemed to be absolute dicks

The women were similarly uniformed with the obligatory Musto blue jacket, jeans and pale pink cotton shirts. Deckkies of course and an expensive handbag, a scarf - usually silk - and "nice hair"
They too seemed a bunch of plonkers.

What a shame that new oysters seem to be only affordable by this sector of society. The comments I overheard confirmed lamentable depths of incompetence and cluelessness.

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Mon Jan 17, 2011 4:25 pm
by Nick
.
Garishly brown? A new colour concept indeed!

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Mon Jan 17, 2011 5:07 pm
by claymore
Para has some.

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Mon Jan 17, 2011 9:37 pm
by Aja
Customers? I thought you were talking about the staff!

Regards
Donald

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Tue Jan 18, 2011 1:35 pm
by Telo
Aja wrote:Customers?
I assumed he was going on about his crew....

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 3:49 pm
by Gardenshed
Proposal for the chentlemen's cruise uniform, 2011?

"Dark Blue overcoat, garishly brown thick corduroy trousers, faded suede deck shoes, a gingham pattern blue checked shirt and a red pullover."

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 4:55 pm
by Rowana
I don't think I have a red pullover!

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Fri Jan 21, 2011 7:57 pm
by Arghiro
I can lend you a pair of dull brown cords. Maybe you could get them gared somewhere?

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Sat Jan 22, 2011 1:59 pm
by ParaHandy
claymore wrote:I feel moved to comment on my observations of the activities and people surrounding the Oyster Stand. The men all seem to wear thick corduroy trousers. To a man [& woman] they all seemed to be absolute dicks [and] plonkers [respectively].

The comments I overheard confirmed lamentable depths of incompetence and cluelessness.
I note my latest edition of "The Lifeboat" has an advert for these garments. It is possible that only those who have had to avail themselves of that organisation's help are the wearer and who thus isolate themself in solitary intellectual masturbation, communicate nothing save their misfortune, stimulates nothing whilst incurious and indifferent to others who have the misfortune to be in their presence.

Hangin' is not good enough ...

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Sat Jan 22, 2011 7:15 pm
by claymore
Is that where ye got yours? :lol:

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Sat Jan 29, 2011 9:47 pm
by ParaHandy
claymore wrote:Is that where ye got yours? :lol:
The brother-in-law, the one who can fall into the Tyne and come out with fivers stuffed under his nose, favours these things which is anither reason for disliking them and furthermore the fekker lives in Edinburgh which is full of them and women in fur coats wi'oot knickers.

However, whilst just reurned from there (we blew a kiss or two when passing the end of the M55), the cheapest diesel from Oxford to Edinburgh was £1.26 a litre and that was Edinburgh so they're not all daft pillocks ...

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Sun Jan 30, 2011 12:40 am
by Ocklepoint
ParaHandy wrote: in fur coats wi'oot knickers.
Where?

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Sun Jan 30, 2011 2:11 pm
by ParaHandy
Ocklepoint wrote:Where?
Only Glaswegians know ... (but try Morningside, Grange or anywhere in the New Town)

Re: Uniforms, Oysters and Dicks

Posted: Sun Jan 30, 2011 4:29 pm
by madhatter
Jeeeez flippin skirt wearers they be all the same :umbrella: