BLUEMOMENT

An extended family of wagtails has chosen Silkie as their preferred evening rendezvous in Balvicar Bay. While they are charming creatures in themselves they are also over-generous with their little calling cards.

I understand that a revolutionary new wagtail scarer is currently undergoing beta testing at a mooring on Scotland's delightful west coast. Does anyone know when this device will be available?

No connection etc., except as a potentially interested purchaser.

We need more detail here me old cocksparrow.
Are they Pied or Grey Wagtails - (Thank god there is no green wagtail) and would you post an image of the calling card.
We at Wagtailscarerandpissoffandshitonanotherbuggersboat work to ISO9000/2000 and this detail is mission critical and would form a key element of our method statement.

Morrisons selling Four Crown again? Told you before to lay off that stuff.

Donald

They're pied wagtails.

I don't have any pictures but if you'll send me your address I'll happily post a representative selection of this material to further your research. I'm pleased to note that your organisation is also pursuing a solution to this problem but I believe that a rival group may be closer to a workable deterrent.

This reference to rival companies is causing some concern in R&D. If you could shed any light or give further information, we would gladly make financial recompense for such information

..industry sources tell me that Rock and Shattered Pottery Developments Inc. are working on a solution based on threatening visual cues.

The time-honoured well-stuffed manilla envelope will be acceptable.

Threatening visual clues - dastardly - I think we can get them under the terms of the Geneva Convention Section 112, subsection 6, Para 94
'and clues visual, hereinafter considered threatening....'

This is well past your bedtime, surely?

Aye it was - but I do hope you are up, about and ready to face the challenges of the new day by now.
Been in work for exactly 23 mins.

Och aye. Deleted my first 6 spammers already.

Correction. That's 8 now.

Silkie wrote:An extended family of wagtails has chosen Silkie as their preferred evening rendezvous in Balvicar Bay ................... a revolutionary new wagtail scarer is currently undergoing beta testing at a mooring on Scotland's delightful west coast.

Thanks for that update. The trials are clearly going well and we hope that the wagtails have settled comfortably into their new abode.

All a bit hush-hush at the moment though. More later.

Only posting this because it gives me a clean sweep in the right hand column.
I really should get oot mair