BLUEMOMENT

ahm much impressed wi the wimmen and nae doobt L'Oreal wud like tae mak some anti-foul which wid dae the same tae the bottom orra ma tub as tae her mug ...

nae doobt, she's nivver dun ony anti-fouling hersel .. as ahm noo covered in the stuff ..

hoo-ivver .. ah wus changing ra anode and ah noted that efter screwing it back oan (standard 8" yin), it wasnae quite flat agin the svelt skin orra ma tub. Ah reckon, ah wid hae tae bash it flatter but ra tide wus coming in awfy fast so ah said feck it and wull, ahm noo worried if ah've done the richt thing .. wid ony otta youse be able tae telt me?

(sort orra dear jane letter if you know what i mean)

Mine's no flush either. It's a bastid when the thin mooring pickup line gets gaught under it. Only thing to to is saw away until it snaps and then tie it back together again. 's going to be 'kin flush next season....for sure

Para m'auld scrote
Dud youse really need tae swap ra feckker in ra furst place? - ah ken weel whit youse es like fer messin - onythin tae tak youse awa fae ra stern glare o' ra missus.

Noo - ef youse did an ra feckker disnae sit flush - dinnae fash yersel laddie - anither week er twa an it'll be flush wi a few molluscs and barnykuls es thry settle doon ahint et.